Excerpts

Campfire Tales is available on Amazon, Kobo, iTunes

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Excerpt: All Alone

“Ellie, come outside! This is fantastic.”

“What?”

“Isn’t it incredible?”

“Mike, what are you talking about?”

“What can you see?”

“Trees, grass, the creek. It’s a beautiful morning. Is that what you mean?”

“I realise you may be a little tired after last night, but I didn’t know I could make you go blind. It’s kind of a compliment really.”

“At the risk of feeding your already healthy ego, last night was a lot of fun, you bad man. But what am I supposed to be looking at?”

“People? Can you see any people, oh little observant new wife of mine?”

“My God! There’s nobody here!”

“Yep. I thought I heard that last campervan leave this morning while we were…busy. Do you realise we’ve got the whole national park to ourselves?”

“This is so weird. Just us and the birds and the kangaroos.”

“Anything you can think of to celebrate, wifey dear?”

“Well, hubby dear, there is one thing that comes to mind. This nightie I’m wearing seems a little unnecessary, don’t you think?”

“Couldn’t agree more.”

“Voila!”

“Very, very, very nice. Okay, me too.”

“Wow.”

“You’d sound a whole lot sexier if you’d stop giggling.”

“Sorry. It’s just so amazing having this place to ourselves. Yeeee-hah!”

“Okay, Ellie, you’re scaring the kangaroos now.”

“Tough. They kept me awake half the night thumping past the tent.”

“Hey, I didn’t tell you. I got up in the middle of the night to have a pee and heard a noise. So I turned on my torch. Bloody hell! There were about fifteen kangaroos two metres away all staring at me.”

“That’s so funny. And talking about staring. Why are you staring at me like that?”

“Because you’re so incredibly pretty.”

“Thank you. Do I look pretty doing a slow spin, like this?  Hmm?”

“Oh yeah. Love that tattoo…Do a cartwheel.”

“Michael Jeffery Coates, you are such a naughty boy!…Are you going to join me out here?

“I might get sunburnt.”

“It’s nine o’clock in the morning!”

“Okay, but if a certain part of my anatomy gets sunburnt, it’ll be your loss, young lady.”

“That little thing? How much could it hurt?”

“That does it. Spanks coming up.”

“You’ve got to catch me first.”

“I’ll give you five seconds head start. Start running.”

“Eeek!”

“One…two…three…four…five…and……got you! And I’d like to point out, you didn’t run too fast. Are you ready to take your punishment, Mrs Coates?”

“I’d rather you gave me a kiss.”

“Where?”

“Um, here?”

“Oh, Ellie Marie Coates, you are such a naughty lady. And I love it. And I love you.”

“I love you too. Oh, God!”

“Mmm?”

“Where you’re kissing me?”

“Yeah?”

“Keep doing it.”

“Anything you say, sweetheart.”

“So, it’s—don’t stop! — a lovely morning.”

“We’ve already established that.”

“And we’re the only two people in this whole enormous park.”

“Also old news. You’re getting boring in your old age. Ouch.”

“I notice that part of your anatomy you mentioned earlier doesn’t seem to be sunburnt.”

“No, luckily for you, he seems to be undamaged.”

“Actually, he looks kind of interested.”

“He? You mean Stanley?”

“You really call him Stanley?”

“It’s an affectionate term. Sometimes, I call him my Throbbing Python of Love.”

“Yuk! Perhaps that’s something you should have mentioned before the church service?”

“Didn’t seem to come up. Anyway, if you could stop laughing, you were talking about a particular, unsunburnt part of my anatomy?”

“Come with me.”

“I hope this is going to be sexy.”

“Oh, I think so. We’re here.”

“And here is?”

“This tree stump. I think it looks…the right height.”

“Oh Jesus…What are you doing?”

“Checking the tree stump for bugs. All clear.”

“Oh, baby, this will be so good. Ready?”

“Oh yes!…Um, Michael?”

“Mmm?”

“Can you hear something?”

Tempting the Billionaire: Erotic Romance in Tropical Paradise is available on:

Amazon, Kobo, Nook

Tempting the Billionaire

Excerpt: Chapter One

Every muscle tightened, ready for attack.

Alex Greenway felt his lips curl into a snarl. He welcomed the fear, the anger. It had been too long since he’d hit a man. The gym and the odd sparring partner didn’t count.

As he walked up the short sandy path, the coral trout he’d caught in one hand, and his spear gun, fins and mask in the other, that old prickling sense of danger had hit him. That prickle, born with him in the back streets of Sydney, had saved his life in Afghanistan. It had even been useful for staring down Armani clad business rivals in Martin Place.

He glanced behind him. Nothing from that direction. The multi-coloured Pacific glittered without menace. The jetty at the northern end of the golden horseshoe bay and the helipad a few metres away were the only indication human beings ever came here. Apart from the chorus of cicadas, everything was silent.

Alex trod lightly up the shallow steps to the front deck of his house. Rested his gun against the railing and placed his fish on the glass table. Then it hit him. What his subconscious had been thumping the back of his head about, ever since he’d waded out of the sea.

The door was open. Just a crack. Seeing as he was the only one on the island, he didn’t bother to lock anything, but he always slid the double glass front doors closed as he left. A legacy of his childhood and misspent adolescence. The danger was inside.

Whoever it was wouldn’t know what hit him.

A puddle of water on the teak deck floor drew his eyes down. He’d been here a week, and it hadn’t rained yet.

His heart pounded as he slid the door open. He curled his hands into fists and he slipped inside.

And frowned. There was another damn puddle of water on the polished wood floor. Hunching down, he examined it. Were those—bubbles? His eyes followed a trail of puddles, each with its own collection of tiny bubbles. The trail led to his bedroom. Silently, he stalked the wide distance of the living room to the closed bedroom door.

He smiled. Show time.

Flinging open the door, Alex leaped inside, crouching, ready. And froze.

What the fuck?

For lying on his bed, with her eyes closed and her chest gently rising and falling, was a naked woman.

How to Deal with a Surprise Penis is available on Amazon.

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Excerpt:

from How to Deal with a Surprise Penis

“Oh! Is…is it…?” Tammy perched on the mattress, her feet tucked up near her bottom, her knees squashing her chest, and darted another glance at his…his…

He made a sort of strangled sound.

Her eyes flew up and the fluttering feeling inside her tummy settled. If she could just keep staring at his face, then everything would be alright. What did he say his name was? Luke? He had such a kind face. Since she had to have, she shuddered, a customer, she knew she was lucky to have him. He had an easy grin, and she loved the way his freckles sprinkled across his nose. Most comforting of all, his blue eyes had a reassuring twinkle.

Taking a deep breath, she turned her head to stare out of the spotted window into the dark alley outside. She could do this. Cyndi did it all the time. She’d earned enough money to pay off her degree and buy a house at the same time. Mind you, Tammy cautioned herself, you don’t look like Cyndi. Anyway, she didn’t want all that. All she wanted was to be able to sleep again. Cyndi had given her this opportunity while she was sick, and darn it, she was going to take it. One night. She swallowed. Maybe two.

It’s not as if you’re a virgin, or anything, Tammy told herself as she nibbled her fingernail. Eric might not have been the world’s greatest lover, but at least she knew what to expect. More or less.

“Is it what?”

The real world returned with a thump. “Um…sorry?”

“I said, is it what?” His deep, gentle voice shook, but he tilted his head and gazed into her eyes, politely ignoring…well, the rest of her.

Oh my goodness! The bed creaked as he lay down. He gave a lazy stretch and raised an eyebrow. And she wasn’t mistaken. There was that twinkle. But her eyes seemed to have a mind of their own, for they drifted down the length of his long, lightly muscled, naked body. He rested his head in his laced fingers as he waited, as if he had all the time in the world.

Turning away, her long hair allowed Tammy to hide her face. She stared at her toes peeking out from the bottom of the sheet she’d wrapped around herself. It doesn’t matter what this man looks like. Close your eyes and think of

But that picture of England’s green hills and valleys escaped her. Her eyes drifted again to that sprinkling of hair across his chest, then to his defined abs, trim belly, and down to his…

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A Bubbly Holiday is for sale on Amazon.

Excerpt:

A Bubbly Holiday – Three Short Stories in Tropical Paradise

I’d like to be under the sea in an octopus’s bathtub in the sha-a-ade…

Laughing at her wittiness, Ellen opened her eyes and gazed out at the view. Not a bad view, she had to say, as views went, seeing as the window took up an entire side of the bathroom.

The brilliant, blue ocean twinkled and sparkled. Dark patches of reef beneath its surface were dotted here and there. A ripple of white, tumbling waves showed the edge of the shallow water before the land dropped into the deep blue Pacific beyond.

As she lay back in her decadent, sunken bathtub, surrounded by frothy bubbles, she breathed in. Hmmm. What was that smell? She tilted her head to one side. It was delicious. Sort of minty, mentholly. Was that a word? Whatever.

She stretched like a satisfied cat and reached for the champagne bottle. “Yes, dear ocean,” she called out to the blue water as she sloshed more Bollinger into her fine crystal flute. Whoops. She giggled. “I will explore your depths soon, soon, my dear, but this wonderful bath is my first love.”

As she carefully placed her glass on the rim of the tub, her eyes rested on a bar of white soap. She picked it up, lifted it to her nose, and inhaled. Heaven. “Heaven is a bar of soap,” she mused out loud, nodding. Why had that never occurred to her before?

The new tiny bikini she’d bought for her first ever luxury holiday beckoned from the king-sized bed in the adjoining room. “Soon, soon, my sexy swimsuit, we’ll swim in the salty sea!”  And didn’t she absolutely ace alliteration? Chortling, she sank beneath the bubbles.

“Who the hell are you?”

Coughing and choking on the water she’d inhaled, she sat up, knocked her champers into the bath with the tidal wave she’d created, clasped her arm to her chest, and looked up, up at a dark haired, well-muscled, nearly naked man whose blue eyes blazed down at her.

“Get out. Now!”

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Buy links: Escape Publishing

Unexpected Places

Excerpt: Chapter One

‘Mate, no offence, but you stink.’

Luke grinned at his old school friend and business partner, Bob Fetler. ‘I wondered why the old lady next to me kept wrinkling her nose. But I wanted to get back to Melbourne in a hurry.’

Peeling off the black, sweaty T-shirt he’d been wearing for the last 48 hours, Luke revealed the hasty first aid he’d performed on himself in the men’s toilets at Changi Airport in Singapore. Red-stained gauze was wrapped around his body from his nipples to his waist.

He grabbed a pair of scissors from Bob’s desk and cut through the layers. They fell in a heavy, sodden heap onto the carpet. Gingerly he removed his underwear, which constituted the makeshift padding. Each pair of underpants was dark red, full of sticky blood. Each fell with a heavy plop to join the mess on the floor.

Damn. The cut was worse than he expected. He’d been too angry to do more than give his chest an impatient glance while it disappeared beneath the layers of bandage. Mai Ling had done a good job. The jagged, gaping slash ran up at a steep slope from the bottom of his ribs to his left nipple. And it hurt like hell.

Bob said hoarsely, ‘How —’

‘I had my hands on the bloody statue.’ He ground his teeth in pure frustration. How the hell could he have been so stupid? He glared down at his chest. ‘But then someone surprised me.’

Bob made a small sound, like a manly whimper. Luke glanced at him. Bob’s face had turned almost green.

His experiences over the past few hours of personal idiocy and feminine betrayal vanished in the face of this more immediate problem. He laughed, pushing Bob’s head towards his knees before he could faint or be sick. The cleaner was going to be cranky enough about the blood, and Bob had a weak stomach.

They were unlikely mates, but they made a good team.

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Heavenly Revenge

Excerpt: Chapter One
“The poor, wee girl. Rose…Rose…can you hear me, love?”

Rose’s eyelids fluttered open. A stark, white light stabbed her eyes, so she shut them again. But in that brief glimpse, she’d seen the blurry faces of two women peering down at her.
“Rose, are you with us, pet? Open your eyes. There’s a good girl. You don’t have much time.”

“Rose!” The other woman spoke this time, her voice sharper in tone. Rose opened her eyes and studied the figures bent over her. Both were older women, about seventy perhaps, with flyaway white hair and white flowing gowns. As she struggled to her feet, they broke out in relieved smiles.

“Good girl. Och, Wilma, she looks so pale, the poor lassie.”

“Everyone who comes here is pale, Lily. I wish you would strive to be less foolish.”

“All I said…”

During this exchange, Rose glanced around at her surroundings and recognized nothing. Flat, barren land, seared in that glaring, white light, stretched to every mist-shrouded horizon. Not another living thing in sight. She breathed in the cool, pure air and frowned at the strange, spongy surface beneath her.

“Where the hell am I?”

Both ladies regarded her with shocked expressions, and the one whose name seemed to be Wilma said, “Now, now, Rose. This isn’t the best place to be using bad language.”

Rose blinked. “I’m sorry. I meant—where am I? And who are you? How do you know my name?”

“My name is Wilma, and this is Lily,” the taller woman answered. Lily beamed, her pale blue eyes warm and welcoming behind her glasses. Rose found herself smiling in return. Wilma continued, “You’re dead. You’re outside the gates of Heaven, but you aren’t allowed to go in.”

Lily glanced reproachfully at her friend.

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